In 2009 on a bus to summer camp a friend of mine said, "Hey listen to this!" and gave me one of her earbuds. She played U R Man by SS501, and I was immediately hooked on KPop. I downloaded everything she gave me onto my MP3, and listened nonstop. As I took in as many KPop music videos as I could, suddenly the music video for "Cassis" by The GazettE showed up on autoplay and I was super curious so I watched that too! And to say I was instantly hooked on vkei would be an understatement. It became my life.
Growing up I was homeschooled in a strict, religious household. Things like Harry Potter and Pokemon were a HUUUGE "Not allowed" because magic was evil!! And boys with makeup?? Boys that looked "feminine"? Ohhh, that was a huge taboo. (Still is today, unfortunately.) KPop and vkei were a side of the world I had never seen before and they were just so cool, unusual, and against the beliefs my parents tried to instill in me.
As I took in everything related to Japanese music and fashion as I could, I ran into gyaru. I thought it was super cool and pretty and sexy but nothing about it stood out to me more than visual kei did. Vkei was SO wild to me, it made gyaru look pretty normal.
THEN I stumbled across this photo.
I already knew and loved DJ SiSeN (right) and was just FLOORED by how extra these gals looked! I had never run into this side of gyaru and I was absolutely hooked. My need to be as extra as possible could totally be fulfilled through manba!
As I got interested, I found some gals online, such as Lillie-Joe (IG lillie_joe), who has inspired me since the beginning with her extreme looks!
But I really wasn't internet savvy...
I wasn't allowed to have MySpace or Facebook, so I had no idea there was an online community. I experimented on my own and felt alone. I had no one I knew who was interested in, and only found 2 or 3 inactive gals online. It seemed like gyaru was dead. So even though I've been into and trying gyaru for 8+ years, I have really only become active in the past few years because I just had no idea how big the internet really was!
Okay, real talk time, because this has been heavy on my heart.
Growing up the way I did, it massively damaged my self confidence. I was supposed to get married around age 20-22 (while also not being allowed to date, mind you), and be a stay at home mom while my husband earned all our income. I was not encouraged to pursue a degree. I was not encouraged to become self-sufficient. I was told I had to find a husband and submit to him. I did not feel pretty, was teased about being fat, and hated everything about myself. I am now 26 and have never had an actual relationship, much less something that could lead to marriage. I'm not even sure I want a marriage. I don't have a college degree because for many years I believed what I was being told, that I just needed to marry a man with a good job. Imagine my self-confidence as an 18-24 year old being told to just wait for my husband to come along, and I couldn't even get a date.
Well, here I am now! Gyaru became my thing because it empowers me. I don't have to be pretty for anyone except me. I don't even want to be pretty for anyone but me!! Manba has always been my calling because of how extra it is. I WANT to stand out. I WANT to be stared at. I WANT to be so unbelievably different from everyone around me. Now I'm a model and staff member in Papillon, I have a blog, a pretty successful TikTok account (as far as gyaru accounts go), and a good Instagram following! My life is filled with this style I'm so unbelievably in love with. I have literally never felt more beautiful, confident, and loved in my life.
What about you? How did you start gyaru? Or how did you become interested? Which styles drew your eye?
